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The Lighter Side: 10 Reasons I NEED a Samsung BotHandy

September 3, 2021
By Corey Noles

Editor’s Note: This article on the Samsung BotHandy was originally published in the Summer Issue of Innovation & Tech Today.

Of the thousands of products I looked at during CES 2021, nothing blew my mind quite like the awesome Samsung BotHandy.

This thing is everything the lazy American needs to truly maximize their coveted couch time. BotHandy can do just about anything, and is arguably, the most impressive home robot we’ve seen to date. Here are 10 reasons why Samsung should send me one immediately.

Assistant

I need an assistant. To have someone waiting around for me to bark orders would really help organize my life. I don’t have time for these new-fangled things like calendars and planners. I want a robot who can simply say “You have a doctor’s appointment at noon today.”

Go-Getter

I’m tired of walking to the bedroom when I forget my charger. I desperately want someone who when I ask for my iPad and a charger, can just go handle that. Because I’m lazy and I don’t really want to do that anymore.

Helper for my Wife

I need someone to go grab a soda from the fridge for my wife. Every night I lay there all comfortably and she looks at me with her beautiful eyes and I cave. “Hey BotHandy, go grab my wife a drink,” is like music to my ears.

CES2021_dl6_Samsung-Bot
Samsung photo

Dishwasher

Dishes suck. BotHandy does dishes. I don’t need to say much else for this one.

Chef

Cooking sucks as much as washing dishes. This thing can cook your dinner. Even if it needs a little help, the ability to streamline cooking would be an improvement. Think of BotHandy as Rosie from The Jetsons. Who doesn’t want a Rosie in their life?

High School Principal

He can be my kids’ high school principal. Let’s face it, if I had any desire to be an educator, I would have studied education in college. I can give BotHandy a ruler and send him in to watch the kids, scramble YouTube and whack them when they touch their phones. This alone frees up hours of my week and likely improves their efficiency as students.

Wingman

If I drink myself into oblivion while trying to get this issue out, BotHandy could call 911 and save my life. Of course, there is a risk of robot-assisted CPR when I’m simply drunk, and I don’t know if one could mentally (or physically) recover from that.

RoboCop

Home security. BotHandy can hang in the living room armed to the hilt like he’s headed for ‘Nam, ready to end any potential intruders while my family and I sleep like babies.

Dog Walker

He can walk the dog when I’m not home (and occasionally when I am). Imagine if while you’re gone for the day, a robot could ensure your dog goes out when they need to handle their business. Let’s be honest here, I don’t look like a guy who walks a lot.

The Only Reason That Matters

Because I want a robot. Since the first time I saw Sico in Rocky IV, I’ve dreamed of this day. And let’s be honest, do we really need a reason other than this?

So, Samsung, I have plead my case. Now step up and send me my robot. ■

Author Bio: Corey Noles is the Managing Editor for Innovation & Tech Today. In more than two decades as a journalist, he has covered crime, MLB, business, healthcare, politics and anything else that could snag a headline.

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